Tid-bits of thankfulness

This week I earnestly sought after things I'm thankful for. I wanted the very things I take for granted to be revealed to me as precious gifts.

That's my favorite part about Thanksgiving. It provokes thought and a reflective posture. It enables me to step back and give praise for all things given by our good Father above. And it makes me want to step back more often throughout the year and remember the beauty and goodness of the life He's given us.

Tid-bits of Thankfulness:

- Alright, I have to gush. My husband tickles my heart! He cares for me so well and is learning and growing in love each and every day. We entered marriage not fully knowing how to care for each other in a way that speaks love and pulls on one another's heart strings (we're still learning and I'm convinced we'll never stop). The past couple months I've experienced Austin tuning into my needs and blasting me with heart darts! I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for this man. 

My hair is gradually getting darker as the winter months continue to lock me indoors due to unruly cold weather. The other day I asked Austin if my hair looked "mousy." He laughed, shook his head and said "No, your hair doesn't look mousy. You look beautiful." And that was that. A few days later we were driving in the car and Austin, out of the blue, said "Katie, I want to treat you to a trip to the hair salon to color your hair." I looked at him with disbelief and thankfulness. You see, he heard me when I asked if my hair looked mousy.  He wants me to feel beautiful and see myself as he sees me. But, the funny thing is, now that he's offered I don't even want my hair colored anymore. He made me feel all the more beautiful by caring and loving me so well. I am thankful for my husband. 

- Austin and I traveled to my parent's house for Thanksgiving this year. My mom assures me every time we visit that we don't need to bring much (or anything!). So, I take that literally and pack the basic toothbrush and foundation and rely on their bath supplies, hair brush, blankets, pillows, food...you name it and rest assure I don't bring it. Last night I went upstairs to gather shampoo and bath essentials to make it through the weekend. I was standing in my parent's bathroom watching them as they opened their cabinets simultaneously and looked for the perfect combination of supplies for me to carry back downstairs. I giggled at the given situation. Yes, it may seem like small act, but to watch them pilfer through their cabinets on hands and knees exemplifies how they are in various areas of life. I am thankful for my parents. 

 - I devoured gluten AND dairy-free pizza. I literally jump up and down at the grocery store when encountering such a treat. I am thankful for non-glutenous and darious foods. 

- Working at Starbucks has enabled me to help pay for my school loans AND I get an endless supply of coffee. Blissful. I am thankful for a job.

- Some friends stopped by Starbucks and surprised me while I was working on Thanksgiving (on other days too). I was so excited! I am thankful for new and growing friendships in Reston.

-  "He has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him..." Colossians 1:22 This verse spoke to my heart when I first understood God's undying love for me. I am thankful for a God who died for me so that I may be holy and blameless before him.


And I am thankful for a heart of thankfulness.

Just a couple of sheep

Austin and I began our adventurous weekend on Thursday night! We drove down to the notorious Blacksburg and enjoyed Mrs. McGill's hospitality. Their home is extremely peaceful and cozy. Needless to say we slept well after staying up well past our bed time.

Early Friday morning Austin and I buckled up and continued our drive to North Carolina. The further south we drove the more beautiful the trees were. Brilliant shades of yellow and orange assaulted my eyes and the sun shone as we carved our way through the mountainous terrain. It was stunning! We arrived in Mooresville, NC around 10am. Juuust enough time to order a coffee before Austin's interview (YES! Interview).

There is a potential possibility that the tree house living Murrays will nestle up in Fayetteville NC this upcoming January. We aren't positive yet, but we are seriously considering this as we seek the Lord for His guidance.

Fayetteville, North Carolina is a town about this big. It's quaint. Slow pace. And different. Austin would have the opportunity to manage projects and people (two things he's stellar in) in an atmosphere more conducive to his personality and our desires. We aren't sure what the Lord is providing but we are open to change! At this time we are taking great comfort in the fact that we, His sheep, hear His voice.

"My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me." John 10:27 

So all day Saturday (after leaving Chris and Christine's lovely home in Charlotte--SO good to see their smiling faces) we explored the town of Fayetteville and near-by colleges (potential Graduate programs for me), walked down old main street, soaked up the warm sunshine on our skin, sat in the window of a coffee shop and ate lunch, and talked to locals about the lifestyle of the town in which they live. It was great. I am so thankful we had the opportunity to explore and visit.

So, that's where we are in this journey called life.

We continue to weigh the advantages and disadvantages of the move, but even more so we continue to trust in our Shepherd who calls us by name and leads us into all that is good.

Wiggles of discontentment

I am terribly wiggly and discontent. My mind is in constant forward motion, thinking the next season will be  better and more exciting than this one. My next job. Our next little nest. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. A part of my heart tells me that God has something else in store for us. Something different. But not now.

That's the trick. To desire what He has for us...in His timing.

My new and improved innate time clock.

The Lord is gently teaching me what it looks like to be content where He's placed me. No matter how long (or short) it may be, He has strategically placed us where He wants us. That's a big pill to swallow, some days more than others, but I'm holding fast to the unbreakable truth that


He has a plan. 

Clumsy and Nonsensical Acts

Austin knew about my clumsiness and sometimes-nonsensical acts. However, since we got married he's had a front row seat in my life's little mishaps.

Since June:

- I left the passenger side window down overnight (on accident) and a BIG thunderous storm rolled through. The next morning (mind you it's about 5 am) Austin opened the car door only to find rainwater sloshing out of the passenger car door. The seat was soaked. He arrived to work with a soggy bottom...

- I let a candle's wick burn too high and the smoke left a black shadow on our slanted, tee pee ceiling.

- I planned a date to the movies and assured Austin of a gift certificate I had so we wouldn't have to pay. It would be a cheap date night! Well, one thing led to another and I was late picking him up from the metro. I rushed there to get him, we rushed to the movie theater, then rushed to the ticket counter."Your total is $20." Smiling, I handed her my gift certificate. "Okay, that will be $19." Umm whoops. Austin smiled, shook his head and said "we are so different." We were late to the movie...


Austin's right. We are so different. He plans ahead, organizes, and pays attention to detail. I am somewhat unorganized, forgetful, and without fail over-pack my schedule. But hey, what's marriage without laughing at each other's differences? And what I love most is that no matter how ridiculous and forgetful I can be Austin still accepts me for the wild forgetful woman I am.

What a man!

Harper's Ferry adventure

Last  weekend Austin and I ventured to Harper's Ferry, West Virginia to breathe in the countryside air and bask in the glory of fall. The trees hadn't turned their vibrant colors yet...but that didn't rain on our fall leaves parade. It was an absolutely gorgeous weekend! We stayed at a bed and breakfast called The Angler's Inn. It is a cozy, quaint place just walking distance from the cobble stone streets of downtown Harper's Ferry.

 

Here we are! Married. In Harper's Ferry. Exploring the town and soaking up God's beautiful creation. Pure bliss.

It was exactly what our hearts needed. I love how timely our Lord is. We haven't spent much time together these past three weeks so this past weekend was looked upon with great anticipation. I'm learning more each day about the friend I have in Austin. 

"You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride." Song of Solomon 4:9

This verse beautifully articulates the closeness Solomon experienced with his beloved- his sister, his friend, his bride. God has entrusted me with Austin, who is not only my husband but my dearest friend! I'm swimming in thankfulness for this wonderful gift and so grateful to God for His life blessings.


Well, that's all folks. More adventures to come...

Just Some Thoughts

I would like to preface this with a note on my hesitations to write a blog. As you may or may not know I did write while I was in Scotland a few years ago. Things were totally new and I supposed that people might enjoy exploring with me as I spent weekends watching my beard grow and hanging out with sheep (as well as meeting fabulous people and profusely enjoying myself). What may be apparent is that I didn't continue to write upon my return due to one reason or another.

So my hesitation is this (and has been vocalised with Katie): I am not sure what I have to write about that is truly worth writing. So my preface includes an apology for this if you find it to be boorish and perhaps unnecessary (I also find Katie's introduction to marital blogging to be somewhat intimidating.)

James 1:2 - Count it all joy, my brothers when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

We are learning the "count it all joy" part. There's no question that "various kinds" become our state regularly. But how do you greet a day that seems utterly exhausting before you get out of bed? What do you think of yourself as a man when you come home to see your wife's dinner plate alone in the sink and the remainder has well cooled before you got home? How do you best spend your evenings after work so that she can remain esteemed and valued?

There are infinite questions to ask concerning the practicals of life particularly in an area that makes it a mission to take as much as it can from you through its nearly fatal commutes (I would like to say this is a bit theatrical and exaggerative but sadly it is reality for millions of people). Perhaps you have experienced this?

So I suppose that good advice as this point would be that tomorrow has enough worries of its own. But how does one get there? And I don't presume to have an elaborate answer but I have experienced the beginnings or the workings of insight. Katie calls me a glutton for punishment. And I would have to agree. When it comes to pushing the limits I will admit that I am not what some call... normal. (You know you're sick when you think that riding a bike for half a day is perfectly normal and culturally commonplace.) Aside from all of that my direction leads to the second portion of the verse... which in my opinion is a bit understated because of the premier difficulty and practicality of the first portion (joy and trials). What goes missing and I have found very culturally difficult is a value of steadfast perseverance.

Whether you see statistics in divorce or drop-outs, suicides or abortions, absent fathers or yard work or dishes. In the end the topic is irrelevant. The truth is: we are not inherent finishers. So how does one fully expend at work and then fight their way home and still finish the day, fully enamored with their wife and fully helpful in household responsibilities? There is no way. Just no way. But I have found that each day when I walk in the door there is a moment in time where that question is posed. And in many circumstances of life it is evident that one chooses or must make a choice but one rarely comprehends the moment in time that such a decision was initially or finally settled upon. To say it another way: one can seldom remember when they made a particular conscious choice or what definitive thoughts led up to the choice. But I get into psychology here and that is neither my predilection nor my expertise.

We can then transition to math for a complete digression: Mathematically there is a definitive moment when you solve 542/12.5. You sit on the question and then at last you find the answer seems to pop like a kernel of delicious popcorn made by Katie on the stove. Life doesn't usually work that way for me. I discover that a choice has already been made and I am already living it out. While this concerns me in other areas and how inputs effect me and my subconscious decision-making process, it is not the case in this instance. In the instance of stepping foot in my home and being greeted by an insanely welcoming wife the choice lingers in the air for at least 3 seconds.

The moral of the story (not fearing sounding tiresomely prosaic): I have never found an evening where I actively chose Christ and actively loved Katie where I have found an instant surge of energy or rush of the Holy Spirit like Samson ripping down pillars. But neither have I found myself disappointed even though I could probably cry out of exhaustion sometimes as I push through cleaning up after dinner.

Now for funny stories (you may find it necessary to stop reading here if you are too dignified for my strange sense of humour):

1. One time I ate a maggot off of a tree whilst hiking.
2. I forgot a utensil for lunch three days in a row when I had chicken noodle soup (which was the bomb- the soup not my ignorance) - Day 1: Dirty construction fingers, Day 2: Dirtier construction fingers, Day 3: Ingenious idea to use a fruit snack wrapper wrapped around a piece of wood to avoid using my fingers (although I can't say it was a whole lot more sanitary)
3. Katie gets totally crazy when I take her on car rides that are too long. We call it car crazy. But if you want to see the real Katie you should take her on a long car ride. It is one of the funniest things to see a tiny ball of insanity bouncing around in the inside of the car when you are trying to drive. She's just a blur of blonde hair and craziness.
4. Katie decided that a motorcycle was cool. I calculated that in a matter of 5 months of commuting on a motorcycle I would have paid for it. Outcome: Kawasaki Vulcan 800.
5. For some reason people got their hopes up yet again for Virginia Tech Hokie football which proved to be entirely consistent with the last decade worth of seasons. I believe the words I would choose are: disheartening, predictable and scant. But we'll get our hopes up again next season and still enjoy the Hokies. Count on it.
6. And perhaps the funniest of them all is Katie's sheer delight when she sees that I have written on our blog.

-Austin
(Apologies for spelling or grammatical errors. I'm not proof-reading as I should. But I do not apologise for British spellings which I simply find more appealing to the eye. Consider them necessary translations for exploring my world)

Desire to Dazzle

Katie here. 

After our first post I had this nagging, unrelenting feeling of concern. It's ironic because I desire, with all my heart, vulnerable and honest relationships... but it's the hardest darn thing to do! I open up with full force and often walk away wondering what others are thinking of my heart being tossed up and handed to them on a platter. But because it's difficult is the very reason I open this little heart of mine. Yup I'm gonna let it shine!

"Living out of the false self creates a compulsive desire to present a perfect image to the public so that everybody will admire us and nobody will know us." 

-Brennan Manning 

I have a compulsive desire to dazzle others and present a perfect image. However, I think we will never truly be known without a massive dose of vulnerability and an understanding of our acceptance and identity in Christ. Once we embrace our brokenness and fling open our hearts to receive grace, we can then push through the threshold of trying to portray perfection. Through blogging and chatting I want to fight the incessant desire to dazzle. I want to portray the unshakable truth that this whole life thing cannot be done apart from God's tremendous grace.  I am broken, sinful, and in desperate need of a Savior who makes all things new. So that's why Austin and I started this blog.  We want to share in the beautiful imperfections, all the while being swept away by a God whose grace sustains.

Me, Myself and I

We have been married 3 months and 19 days.

Wow.

Married life has been the most incredible experience, yet the most challenging obstacle I've overtaken. Austin and I waited a year and a half (literally, almost to the day) to get married. When I woke up on our wedding day, sun happily shining in my window, laying in bed with two of my favorite girls giggling with excitement, I felt ready (and I mean ready) to marry the man of my dreams. God exceeded my desires and gave me Austin and I promised Him I would care for the man entrusted to me.

However, what I didn't realize and didn't prepare for in my year and a half engagement was my selfishness.

I mean we studied marriage. How in the world was I not prepared? We were eager and excited to learn. And we did. We read countless books on marriage, listened to pod-casts, talked with various married couples, asked questions and exchanged hypothetical situations with each other and how we would handle them, and graduated from pre-marriage class with flying colors. We had all our bases covered. The basic "roles" were a no-brainer. We felt ready. I was confident in who I'd be as a wife. But, that's just it...I was confident in me, myself and I.

One thing I've learned throughout these past 3 months is that I cannot love Austin without being completely dependent on my Savior, who is the Author of love. The obstacles I've experienced are not because Austin is hard to live with or that I'm getting used to having a roommate or something silly like that. The obstacles are set in place because I've put them there. Me, myself and I have a selfishness problem and me, myself and I cannot rid me, myself and I of a selfishness problem without the overpowering, life changing love of a selfless God.

My heart is a constant battle ground. Jesus-in-me sometimes wins and other times I give way to my innate self-seeking desires. But the good news is: I married a man who is patient and serve a God who is gracious.

I realize now, 3 months and 19 days into marriage that I cannot rely on me, myself and I. Instead I put my confidence in the One who gave me my very breath, He who created marriage, He who gives me strength to love, serve, and care for my husband joyfully.

There it is. Bare-bones.